A little over a month ago, I came home, collapsed on the ground and cried. I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t breath, I felt frozen. My fiance confused and worried asked “What’s going on!” and it took me so long to say anything. I would say I am an overall happy person. I don’t think we have time to be sad because I don’t want to spend a minute of my life not enjoying it. I know that there will obviously be days that I hate such as math tests, paying bills and other adult responsibilities, so those don’t count. When my fiance saw me he knew something was up. I was crying because I couldn’t stand my job anymore.
I felt trapped, like I had nowhere to turn and really no other choices. I needed to pay bills and yes I could get another job, but there was no way I could match the pay in North Dakota. I won’t say it to slang their name but if you know me, you know exactly where I am talking about. I worked full time and sometimes overtime which the pay was amazing! When I first started, we had the best team and we were so cohesive and had amazing sales. In October of 2018 a new store manager started and everyone quit (more on that later). I stuck around for a few reasons: 1) I felt bad leaving her with no team and 2) I thought maybe she could change once she figured out the store a little more. In late October/early November, the assistant manager left because she couldn’t handle the new manager. I wanted guaranteed hours and higher pay so I stepped forward and applied to be her assistant manager. That day I made the best and worst decision of my life.
Let’s start with the bad. This place literally made me so sick. I was overworked which caused me to get so sick and I was even out for a month. I had multiple doctor’s notes saying I had a viral infection as well as the flu. It was a crazy time nonetheless. I turned in my doctors notes promptly to keep my manager informed and thought everything was fine. I was called into work everyday. EVERYDAY. I couldn’t go because I couldn’t leave the couch without passing out. I also was treated like a child and would text me saying that she was going to “count down” or me to respond. Remember when your mom would count for you to do something and if you didn’t it was a bad day? SHE LITERALLY DID THE COUNTDOWN THING TO ME OVER TEXT. She also threatened multiple times to write me up even though I had doctor’s notes as well as 98% of my shifts covered for a whole month. I tried to stay positive during the whole thing by justifying that she justs wants to push me to do my best. Come late December we finally had a staff. When I started in August I requested only 2 days off. A doctor’s appointment and christmas eve. Christmas is my favorite holiday and being in retail it can be hard to get the day off. When I put my request in 5 months in advance, I saw that no one requested it off! I was so happy because I was guaranteed to have it off. Well the schedule came up and the store manager told me I couldn’t see my family because…..
Because…. Just guess.
SHE WANTED TO SEE HERS. Pardon the language and if you are a minor skip this part. These were my thoughts when she said this. “YOU STUPID BITCH I REQUESTED IT OFF FIRST SO I COULD SEE MY FAMILY TOO WHICH I HAVEN’T SEEN IN LITERALLY MONTHS BECAUSE OF YOU ALWAYS TAKING DAYS OFF, so on and so forth. The next thing I said I regretted at first but now I don’t. First a preface, after finding out I didn’t have the day off I called my mom and told her and she said they would come up and see me. I wanted to be home for christmas but I was so thankful my mom would come up. A couple weeks before she told me she didn’t have the best relationship with her kids (she was divorced it was rough).
I looked at her and said, at least I have a family that wants to see me.
I know that it was wrong but I realized that it was a sentence that was a phrase full of all my anger toward her. Fast forward to the new year I was sick again for 2 ½ weeks from being overworked, going to school full time and so on. After the two weeks was up I went back in for my first day back. As much as I love being lazy, I can only sit on the couch so long, so needless to say I was excited to work again. My manager went in the back to talk and catch up and well, I FELL. After being out for 2 ½ weeks, I fell. I got a nasty scratch on my collarbone, broke my glasses and fell on my eye. When I realized what had happened, I couldn’t see. I had never been so scared and thought I was going blind. I ended up going to the clinic and turns out I didn’t fall on my eye. I hit my head so hard on the tile floor it affected my vision. After hearing that I knew right away: I might have a concussion.
I prayed I didn’t have a concussion because I would be out for a very very long time, at least 3 months, the doctor said. He wasn’t sure if I had a concussion so he had my fiance watch me all night to make sure I wasn’t fading in and out. Vomiting, having dilated pupils. Etc. After this and multiple sickness and horrible mistreatment I was now thinking this place may not be for me. After filing my workman’s comp claim and healing and getting sick again, I was out for a while. While all this happened, our district manager was coming to the store to do a review and talk about suggestions and changes. I was advised not to go back to work and brought in the doctor’s notes and receipts for visits. She talked to me about being sick so much (will talk about in a future post) and so on. She told me I needed to take vitamins ( I do) and then told me I was taking the wrong ones. According to her, I should not take my doctor recommended vitamins and take hers. I told her what was up and about a certain disease I have (will discuss in a later post). For the time being to briefly discuss my disease, it impacts my adrenal glands and my thyroid, so I don’t get adequate levels of adrenaline, melatonin, etc, which affects my immune system and makes me more likely to get sick.
After I told her about this disease and everything she looks me in the eye and says:
I don’t care about you or what is wrong with you.
Well needless to say about a month later I quit. They ended up cutting my hours and it was bulls***.
I could go on and on about this place but after two full pages of me ranting about this place but I will spare my fingers but the point of all this is. If you are being mistreated or just plain hate your job. PLEASE LEAVE. I wish I could go back to October and tell myself to get out NOW. I will say having assistant manager experience has helped me so much and I have learned more about marketing and business overviews than I ever have. One of my favorite quotes of all time relating to the workplace is:
“A bad manager can take a good staff and destroy it, causing the best employees to leave and the remainder to lose all motivation.”
In my last post about stuff you need in your office, I highlighted how important it was to be happy in your job. If you aren’t happy doing what you’re doing, please make a change. What is the point of making $50 an hour and HATING IT. I would rather work for free and absolutely love what I do (kind of like I am now) but I haven’t been happier.
I could write for hours on this topic and the moral of the story if you aren’t happy make a CHANGE. Start right now. If you hate your job, put in your two weeks. If you hate your living situation, either move or try to find ways to liven the place up to your tastes. No matter what, just try to be happy, even when it’s the hardest.
“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.” -Dumbledoor, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.
Thanks for reading everyone! I know this post was a little weird and different but I wanted to try it out as something new! DO you have any crazy work stories like mine? Let me know down below! If you want more posts like this send me a message on Instagram @ sunshineandseasoning.
Thanks for reading, and I hope you have a wonderful day.